When Allah created all things and when He bestowed with His grace, they became different from each other
Allah Ta’ala has mentioned this difference in the Holy Qur’an.
“And We have raised some of them above others” Quran 43:32
This virtue can be related to physical skill, knowledge, depth of thought, ability, means of livelihood, etc. Allah Almighty says about talut in the Quran.
And their Prophetصَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ said to them that indeed Allah has sent Sawan to you as a king and they said
How can he rule over us when we deserve more than him and he has not been given a measure of wealth?
He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
‘Indeed, Allah has chosen him over you and greatly increased his knowledge and progress, and Allah bestows His sovereignty on whom He wills, and Allah is All-Comprehensive, All-Knowing.” Quran2:247
For this reason, Islam addresses people according to their minds and the extent to which they understand.
The Prophetصَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: Do not speak to a nation that is beyond their understanding, except that it may cause temptation for them to say something.
On the authority of Hazrat Aliرضی اللہ تعالٰی عنہ, may Allah be pleased with him, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “Speak to the people with what is in their power; do you want Allah and His Messenger صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ to be denied?”
The point here is that Islam recognizes individual differences between people or, in other words, it recognizes the difference between people’s beliefs. What concerns the husband does not necessarily concern the wife and the concern of the children may be different from that of the head of the family keeping in mind a basic principle that accommodates these concerns and differences.
As it applies to the entire Muslim community, it also applies to the Muslim family the interests of the husband are different from those of the wife, therefore it is imperative for the head of the family to take care of these differences and not turn them into a conflict. Which harmed his life and the lives of those around him.
The Prophet Muhammad صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ(peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) who is a great example cared about individual differences which he clarified and dealt with in a positive manner.
And changed from the point of view of conflicts to education and enlightenment.
Here, when one of the mothers of the believers sent a bowl full of food to him, the first wife, in whose house he was present, gave the hand of the servant who brought the bowl of food. The cup broke and fell, but according to the majority of narrators except Imam Bukhari, the first and second wives are pure.
Hazrat Ayesha and Hazrat Salma Ziyaa Ta’ala Anhu
The Messenger of Allahصَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ(peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) collected the pieces of the bowl
And they went to collect the food in it and said: Your mother became jealous.
Then heصَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) led the servant to the house where he was
He took a bowl from him and gave it to the one whose bowl was broken and put the broken bowl in its place.
One of the best ways to deal with women’s individual differences is jealousy .Which should be dealt with sensibly and without giving it too much importance.
In this way, the Messenger of Allah صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ(peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) paid attention to individual differences when dealing with children.
Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: We prayed Isha with the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) and whenever he prostrated, Hasan and Husayn (may Allah be pleased with him) prostrated, and Allah was pleased with them. But jumped.
And every time you raised your head you took them gently with your hand behind your stomach
And placed them on the ground, and whenever he (PBUH) prostrated again, they would return
Even when he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) finished the prayer, he (peace be upon him) made him sit on his lap.
Imam Ahmed says how happy children are when they do this with their father during prayer
Many husbands make the mistake of wanting their wives and children to eliminate these individual differences from their lives. And force everyone to share their own desires, inclinations, and desires. In this way, the harvest is nothing but trouble in the house and not in the society.
Among these examples of individual differences should be noted and used as an educational tool
It is that for many women a pleasant and kind word from a husband is better than many things in their eyes.
Unfortunately, the city may find it strange and unnecessary to say such words at this stage of its life
Neglect of this need can make a wife feel bad.
Thus, some children wait for their father to come home from work to surprise them with a mat or a toy. Unfortunately, many fathers forget this. And because of which the children feel silent when the father returns home. Also, many children love to play but their fathers don’t appreciate it. This has a negative impact on the upbringing of children